Political Penguin

A warning was issued today that over exposure to rubbish right wing journalism may have a significant detrimental effect to the human brain, particularly those in middle age.

People who read publications like the Daily Mail after prolonged exposure may exhibit a number of worrying symptoms. These include the loss of ability to analyse information objectively, a belief that any properly done research can never be correct against inconsistant and contradictory views and an almost fanatical belief that whatever they believe is right and anyone who disagrees is part of a worldwide conspiracy against them.

In addition to these symptom there are also indications that people may develop a paranoid fear of young people and lose both the ability to communicate with them and believe that the state is secretly intent on watching every movement that they make.

Speaking on the issue Baroness Codswallop of Crackpotshire, a renown and well respected rent a gob said,

“We’re very concerned about this issue. I’ve had a bit of a think about it and this is very worrying. We could see people retreating into isolation, not able to communicate with especially young people in any truly meaningful way. They may even in severe cases try to retreat from the world entirely and not leave the house because they believe that the sky may fall in.”

She added,

“Even more worrying is that these people actually have the right to vote and their paranoid fantasies about the world may even lead them into voting for a party that deliberately plays on their fears about the world and everyone around them.”

Legal:

This is a spoof, apparently another symtom is the inability to spot irony, sarcasm or satire.